Brahmani Velagapudi Week #14: Summer
Alida Nugent wrote "You still crave summer, but sometimes you mean summer five years ago"
When I first read the quote online in middle school I brushed past it and forgot about it because the words didn't mean anything to me then, but a couple weeks ago in my endless scrolling, I found it again. Or rather, it found me again. This time when I read it I understood exactly what Nugent meant when she wrote that.
With college applications, acceptances, and rejections floating around in everyone's minds, as their favorite seniors are either mourning or rejoicing, it seems inevitable that as juniors we can't help, but think about it too and feel anxious about our own futures. Recently my feelings of nostalgia have been amplified as I start seriously thinking about where I'll be next year in August and what I'll be doing. It also leads to a great deal of anxiety as I think about how we got here so fast. It feels like we blinked and suddenly we're no longer 10 years old and our biggest problems are no longer what we should do after school.
Summer hasn't felt the same the past few years. It no longer feels like its own kind of magic the way it used to. It no longer just means fighting to eat popsicles before they melt, reading in the glare of the sun, and sleeping with all your sheets kicked off and your window open to the chirping of crickets. Now it means SAT tutoring, summer internships, and college applications.
I remember being so desperate to grow up and be able to do all these things that I thought "grown-up" people could do while not realizing that when I did grow up I'd wish I was younger again.
I miss when summer felt like summer. I miss summer five years ago.
Hi Brahmani. Your article resonated with me—life seems like it’s gone so fast, and it’s almost laughable that my strong desire to be older would flip to a desire to be young again. It’s even crazier to think that in a year and a few months, we will all be out of high school and pushed into the real world. I agree that those long-ago summers as elementary schoolers and even during the pandemic were so relaxed and free; we could do anything we wanted and only worried about whether our friends could come and play with us. I remember having so much fun with kids in my neighborhood and my sister while we played silly games and made up sillier stories. Reading your article made me reminisce about all the good times I had back then, and it’s great to see that there are others who feel the same way I do—almost a bittersweet nostalgia—about childhood summer vacations.
ReplyDeleteHi Brahmani! I was able to relive many nostalgic memories while reading your blog. Recently, I also viewed a video in which the creator included many images from the past that we were once familiar with. Somehow, unknowingly, we use our favorite toys for the last time and visit our favorite park one last time. Looking back, I regret not enjoying my childhood as much as I could have. If I was allowed to relive my younger years, I would definitely be much more grateful for every hour of free time and every small activity I participated in. In the past few years, many seniors decided to bring their childhood backpacks and cartoons to school to experience the nostalgia and innocence that they felt in Kindergarten. Similarly, many seniors take their graduation pictures at their elementary school as an ode to the place where their education started. Your blog made me think about how bittersweet it is that we will never truly get to be a meek kid in elementary school again.
ReplyDeleteHowever, the feelings of regret and nostalgia have also caused me to become more grateful for my current life. Although I can not go back in time to my elementary school years, I can spend more time with my family right now and appreciate that I do not have to think about paying taxes or cooking food. Instead, I can focus on my academics and spend time with my friends. Although college applications and grades are stressful, I am thankful that I do not have to worry about supporting my household and maintaining a job.
Hi Brahmani, I love your topic and wholeheartedly agree with your thoughts. The meaning of summer has completely changed now that we’re older. I used to long for summer in elementary and middle school, and that was the only thing keeping me motivated in school- knowing that I was going to have a long and relaxing two months traveling or hanging out with friends. However, now when I hear the word “summer,” all I can think about are internships, SAT preparation, and starting college applications. No T.V. No friends. No hanging out. No fun. We are still kids, yet we are unable to enjoy our last summers as one. This blog reminded me of Phineas and Ferb, a T.V show about two kids that would do something extremely fun every day of summer. They would make cool inventions, hang out with their friends, and annoy their sister. Summer looked absolutely magical in the way the T.V show portrayed it. However, in the finale episode, it depicts Phineas and Ferb as teenagers in high school, and just like that, their eyes once full of life looked completely drained. Unfortunately, even cartoon characters grow up. I would hope that their experience is not relatable, but sadly, I am sure every teenager in the Bay Area understands.
ReplyDeleteHi Brahmani, I love the quote that you choose for your blog. I completely relate to you and I understand the quote the same way as you. I do miss summer, I miss the summer when we were just kids. The summer where I got to go to sleep overs everyday of the week. The summer where I could play outside in the park. The summer where I could stay home sleep in and play games all day. Now all my summers are filled with waking up early in the morning. Do all my chores, finish all my summer courses and study for next year. Summer now just feels like in extension of school without the actual school part. Summer is not filled with all the stress for all the huge test. Especially now that we have college aps soon, it becomes very scary.
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